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Aash wrote:

 Skinnereal wrote:

 insaniak wrote:

 Easy E wrote:

The Needful - The act/action that needs to be done to move forward
"The engineer went back and did the Needful."

While most of your list made my head hurt, 'needful' is a word, and the above was very common usage when I was growing up, although seems less prevalent these days.

This is probably an old English phrase, which I have only heard used by teams I used to work with in India.

My Favourite usage of “needful” I’ve heard is as a euphemism for going to the toilet. Always makes me smirk now when I hear it used in other contexts.

That’s my experience too.

 Dysartes wrote:
I mean, I'm amused by the typo in Ahtman's response.

There is no errer in my statment.

Last sentence starts with Obliviously, when one would normally expect Obviously. Unless it was deliberate. Which was not obvious.

Needs more strategery to straighten it out.

Ahtman, do the needful and make the edits.

That reminds me. . . and unfortunately may trigger some of my fellow US veteran comrades: behoove.

As in, "it would behoove you to stay off the fething grass before sergeant major sticks a boot up your. . "


EDIT: on the subject of military. . . Any use of your service's "word" in anything other than the most ironic/sarcastic way possible. By "word" I mean the army's Hooah!, Marine's Oorah! and that sort of thing. Anyone who uses those terms unironically wears their dogtags on the weekends, and goes to the mall in their boots.

"Addicting"

The. Word. Is. AddictIVE.

Add me to the list of old men shaking their fist at the use of literally as figuratively too

My pet hate is one used repeatedly by media normally regarding a football player and it's "unplayable".
They think it means he/she played well. It doesn't. It means they could not play due to injury, poor form or whatever reason they can come up with.
I believe they mean unplayable against, which is completely different. It's another example of the butchery of language used frequently now.
It's just sheer laziness, bad enough when used by the public but inexcusable for an allegedly professional journalist.

 Ahtman wrote:
We must leverage vertical synergy

Had a meeting at work with reps from one of the big social media platforms. The one dude was a walking business jargon/buzzword generator (like this but in a dress shirt and pants: https://www.atrixnet.com/bs-generator.html). Best I've ever heard, and I'm no rookie with this gak. After a while, I wanted to start writing those gems down but couldn't keep up because of how rapid fire they were coming.

Off the top of my head, I recall a line about "balancing externalities and synergies" but literally every sentence was loaded, like something out of a comedy show skit.

Best thing is, that guy's jargon was probably intended to confuse more than enlighten.

I find the more someone says phrases like that the more desperate they are to obfuscate the fact they don't really contribute anything useful and they earn a salary doing nowt.

Your not suggesting they just use big words for to sound moar clevererest?

They are just vociferizing!

I find jargon and hip-lingo particularly annoying as professionally I have to communicate in plain English.

I can use acronyms in my correspondence, but only after I’ve explained them. For example in the first instance I might say “Young Man’s Christian Association (YMCA)”, then simply use “YMCA” after that.

It absolutely boils my piss when I get a business file and they’re using acronyms without telling me what the blinking flip they mean. It means I have to go back and ask, and I can be chasing that simple “you should have used this the first time you cretin” information for a fortnight or more. Even then they’ll miss a few.

 Easy E wrote:
Best thing is, that guy's jargon was probably intended to confuse more than enlighten.

I'm not going to get specific about anything, but I felt like the reps were sensitive to and maybe overcompensating for the nature of the platform in particular. And maybe for who we were. So they may have felt like they had to zhuzh it up a bit, I dunno.

Yeah, we can add people who only speak in management and people who only communicate via buzzword bingo to the list of things that irk me.

 Easy E wrote:
Best thing is, that guy's jargon was probably intended to confuse more than enlighten.

Every time I've heard it used, that's EXACTLY what it's intended to do. It's used to sound important and smart while saying very little or nothing of use.

Jaxmeister wrote:
My pet hate is one used repeatedly by media normally regarding a football player and it's "unplayable".
They think it means he/she played well. It doesn't. It means they could not play due to injury, poor form or whatever reason they can come up with.
I believe they mean unplayable against, which is completely different. It's another example of the butchery of language used frequently now.
It's just sheer laziness, bad enough when used by the public but inexcusable for an allegedly professional journalist.

This reminds me of another, potentially uniquely American one. . . .

See, you Brits, Aussies, Kiwis, and general "commonwealth" types will know the term scrum. It's a specific action designed to put the ball back in play during a rugby match.

So, what could possibly be annoying about the term scrum??? Well, fine folks, I submit to you, the American sports commentator who, upon seeing any form of general pile of human bodies, particularly during an american football game, will declare "ohh the refs will have to dig the ball out of that scrum" . . . Or, "they blow the play dead amid that scrum of players" (when a better descriptor for that latter one would be a maul, but I digress). Like, are american football-isms and euphemisms not good enough, you have to butcher another, much better sport's words too!?

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
I find jargon and hip-lingo particularly annoying as professionally I have to communicate in plain English.

I can use acronyms in my correspondence, but only after I’ve explained them. For example in the first instance I might say “Young Man’s Christian Association (YMCA)”, then simply use “YMCA” after that.

It absolutely boils my piss when I get a business file and they’re using acronyms without telling me what the blinking flip they mean. It means I have to go back and ask, and I can be chasing that simple “you should have used this the first time you cretin” information for a fortnight or more. Even then they’ll miss a few.

My bosses got called out for that in a meeting/info-dump yesterday. They asked for questions, and the first one was for them to stop using acronyms without telling us what they mean first.

I work in tech, and TLAs (three-letter acronyms) are so prevalent, we can't have a conversation of less than 5 minutes without using them throughout. But that is to a like-minded audience. But a lot of the same acronyms are used elsewhere, in other fields, and we all get confused when they overlap.

I’m currently mentoring newbies, and I regularly find myself having to stop, go back, and explain what the heck I just said! For instance, we have an internal database called Discovery, which is commonly referred to as Disco. Clear communication requires me to explain that to the mentees, at least the first couple of times.

It’s just….respectful as well. Professionally, I want people I’m communicating with to understand me, and be somewhat enlightened about whatever it is I’m wittering about. Piling on nu-speak, bingolingo and TLA just…don’t achieve that so well.

I can’t imagine paying a consultancy’s rates, only for them to come in and talk utter, incomprehensible bollocks at me.

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
Clear communication requires me to explain that to the mentees, at least the first couple of times.

The repeat of information is often where some fail when it comes to teaching acronyms or indeed anything, esp to other adults. People forget that a huge part of learning something new or familiarising yourself with a new approach is built on the foundation of repetition of information so it sticks. I hate when those tasked to teach/mentor/introduce will mention something once and consider that enough. Yes you've mentioned it, yes that information is out there; but you've mentioned it one time, the chances of it sticking along with all the other new information is - less.


Of course newbies also have to take notes and put effort into learning, so its not all one sided.

 Overread wrote:

 Mad Doc Grotsnik wrote:
Clear communication requires me to explain that to the mentees, at least the first couple of times.

The repeat of information is often where some fail when it comes to teaching acronyms or indeed anything, esp to other adults. People forget that a huge part of learning something new or familiarising yourself with a new approach is built on the foundation of repetition of information so it sticks. I hate when those tasked to teach/mentor/introduce will mention something once and consider that enough. Yes you've mentioned it, yes that information is out there; but you've mentioned it one time, the chances of it sticking along with all the other new information is - less.


Of course newbies also have to take notes and put effort into learning, so its not all one sided.

This used to be expected in some fields. I know a lot of senior doctors today were expected to follow the adage "see one, do one, teach one" when it came to learning new procedures when they were juniors 20, 30, 40 years ago. Some carry that mentality forward, but most recognise it is pretty dangerous and leads to poor outcomes.

 Skinnereal wrote:

I work in tech, and TLAs (three-letter acronyms) are so prevalent, we can't have a conversation of less than 5 minutes without using them throughout. But that is to a like-minded audience. But a lot of the same acronyms are used elsewhere, in other fields, and we all get confused when they overlap.

I work in IT in the cosmetics industry, if I refer to MAC I could be talking about 3 different things...

Crispy78 wrote:

 Skinnereal wrote:

I work in tech, and TLAs (three-letter acronyms) are so prevalent, we can't have a conversation of less than 5 minutes without using them throughout. But that is to a like-minded audience. But a lot of the same acronyms are used elsewhere, in other fields, and we all get confused when they overlap.

I work in IT in the cosmetics industry, if I refer to MAC I could be talking about 3 different things...

This reminds me of a hospital I have worked in that had signs pointing in one direction towards CCU and in another towards... CCU... One was the Coronary Care Unit and the other was the Critical Care Unit! Both involved different kinds of intensive care too...

 Haighus wrote:

Crispy78 wrote:

 Skinnereal wrote:

I work in tech, and TLAs (three-letter acronyms) are so prevalent, we can't have a conversation of less than 5 minutes without using them throughout. But that is to a like-minded audience. But a lot of the same acronyms are used elsewhere, in other fields, and we all get confused when they overlap.

I work in IT in the cosmetics industry, if I refer to MAC I could be talking about 3 different things...

This reminds me of a hospital I have worked in that had signs pointing in one direction towards CCU and in another towards... CCU... One was the Coronary Care Unit and the other was the Critical Care Unit! Both involved different kinds of intensive care too...

I’ve just been into our local hospital and they transferred us from A&E to the “Minor Injuries and Minor Illness” department after triage; instructions were “follow the purple line and head to Miami”, which brightened my day a bit…

I’ve heard that TAHITI is a magical place to recover from injuries as well

This feels appropriate here considering the discussion of jargon.

 gorgon wrote:

 Ahtman wrote:
We must leverage vertical synergy

Had a meeting at work with reps from one of the big social media platforms. The one dude was a walking business jargon/buzzword generator (like this but in a dress shirt and pants: https://www.atrixnet.com/bs-generator.html). Best I've ever heard, and I'm no rookie with this gak. After a while, I wanted to start writing those gems down but couldn't keep up because of how rapid fire they were coming.

Off the top of my head, I recall a line about "balancing externalities and synergies" but literally every sentence was loaded, like something out of a comedy show skit.

Does anyone ever call out that stuff, for example after a 10minute monologue just go "so leaving out all the word soup, what was the actual point in all that?"

Bran Dawri wrote:

 gorgon wrote:

 Ahtman wrote:
We must leverage vertical synergy

Had a meeting at work with reps from one of the big social media platforms. The one dude was a walking business jargon/buzzword generator (like this but in a dress shirt and pants: https://www.atrixnet.com/bs-generator.html). Best I've ever heard, and I'm no rookie with this gak. After a while, I wanted to start writing those gems down but couldn't keep up because of how rapid fire they were coming.

Off the top of my head, I recall a line about "balancing externalities and synergies" but literally every sentence was loaded, like something out of a comedy show skit.

Does anyone ever call out that stuff, for example after a 10minute monologue just go "so leaving out all the word soup, what was the actual point in all that?"

Generally, one does that once early in one's career. Then you are persona non grata in that company, get all the crummy jobs, no raise, no promotion, get dumped on by management... Afterward that, one learns to keep one's mouth shut in meetings unless one is the highest-ranked person there.

Bosses don't respond well to having their bovine excrement questioned.

One of my former bosses always used to ask, "Remind me, are we talking about real money here, or fake money?"

It is amazing how much money talk is fake money.

Bran Dawri wrote:

 gorgon wrote:

 Ahtman wrote:
We must leverage vertical synergy

Had a meeting at work with reps from one of the big social media platforms. The one dude was a walking business jargon/buzzword generator (like this but in a dress shirt and pants: https://www.atrixnet.com/bs-generator.html). Best I've ever heard, and I'm no rookie with this gak. After a while, I wanted to start writing those gems down but couldn't keep up because of how rapid fire they were coming.

Off the top of my head, I recall a line about "balancing externalities and synergies" but literally every sentence was loaded, like something out of a comedy show skit.

Does anyone ever call out that stuff, for example after a 10minute monologue just go "so leaving out all the word soup, what was the actual point in all that?"

In my example it was a vendor coming into the office, and he was just one of the presenters. No real point to dunking on the guy in front of everyone.